Sigh

I must say I'm not enjoying work at all. Let's just leave the reason for now as I can't spend time with my baby anymore and I'm always so tired I feel my quality of life is compromised. The fatigue just got worse this week. I have to take a nap from 8-10 in the evening. Actually, that was meant to be a 15 minutes rest but I just fall asleep and nothing can ever wake me up, not even the cries of my baby. I'll just tell Desmond to settle her. I feel like such a terrible mother.

Speaking of my baby, she hasn't recovered from her illness yet. It's close to two weeks since she started sniffing and coughing. Briefly, she did seem to be getting well, until she got worse over the weekend again. We had to take her to a paediatrician who told us babies usually take longer to recover, maybe even up to 2 weeks. That's good news because we can be sure for now there's nothing wrong with Alyssa. Hopefully she will recover with the new medication that is being administered to her. (Illadin loses efficacy after 5 days of continual usage and rhinathiol did nothing for her coughing. Now we are on to Bromhexine, a medication for respiratory tract infection to 'dilute' the mucus produced, and Cetirizine for her running nose.) However, the doctor cautioned us that she may develop bronchitis if this persists for too long (mucus stuck in her airway causing asthma-like symptoms) so we still need to monitor her very closely.

Besides the illness, Alyssa had been a darling as usual. She just turned 4 months old yesterday and we took her to a salon to shave her hair off because her hair was perpetually bad-looking. She was so good at the salon. She just sat patiently for the job to be done. No wailing or crying. She wasn't even slightly shifty, though she must be wondering what we were trying to do to her.

I think she looks cuter now that she is without hair, but she also looks more like a boy.

Time really flies. 4 months have passed even before I realised it. I won't be able to recognise her if I looked at her newborn pictures.

Before I know it, she'll be running round and I'll be old and dying. I need to cherish all the precious moments I have with her.

Time is evil.